The Loopdown

A week that refuses to end. 52 iterations of the same Wednesday — the namesake of this whole repo.

Brief introduction:

Ever had a crappy week and wondered if you could redo the entire thing all over again? What if that opportunity was handed to you through some mysterious cosmic intervention? How would you spend the chance that you’ve been given? And what would you do if that “Redo” that you’ve been given keeps on looping, never seeming to end? For there is a saying, “Time is a loop that you can loop into any time you want. But don't expect time to stop where you do. Because change is a continuous process, and it happens whether you want to or not.”

The Loopdown

389th March 2020- Wednesday: Week 52

The loop always restarts on a Wednesday. This is its 52nd iteration. I woke up to the aggravating tune of "Tunak Tunak" and once again cursed myself from 51 loops ago for setting this as my alarm. It's common knowledge that a good song will either die as your favorite or live long enough to be hated as your alarm.

The other reason why I despise this song now is that it serves as a reminder to me that I have failed yet again to break free from the loop. Every 31st night, I go to sleep, changing my alarm to the soothing melody of "Tadow", with the hope that I get to see the morning of April 1st. Alas, the Tunak Tunak playing right now is a sure sign that I'm still stuck in my Groundhog Week.

I am disturbed from my self-deprecating reverie by Arjun's loud, insistent banging on my door and his futile tirade to wake me up.

"Karthik, wake up bro. It's almost 9 now. We have just enough time to grab breakfast and just be 15 mins late for UNIX. Any later and Sir is going to lock us out. Both of us are already short on attendance. I also heard that today's breakfast is something good, WAKE UP YOU [redacted]".

Although he means well since I've been through this cycle countless times, only I realize the futility of everything he has stated.

"Arju, it's already 9. I'm not in the mood to spend 20 mins for some pathetic pieces of rock idli. And no matter what we do, we'll anyway be kicked out of class when we reach there, considering the mad mood Ramwaal is in today. Heed my advice and just chuck this class and study for today's AI test."

"Wait, how'd you know it was idli today? It is supposed to be a new menu today. Wait, What test? We don't have any scheduled for today. Karthik WAKE UP, whatcha blabbering about."

Ugh, I'm done having this same conversation every 25th. There is no legal way to convince them about the numerous iterations of the surprise AI test I have been through or about the idli that chipped off Akashat's tooth. While they would be in awe of my prophetic powers, the next week is just going to reset them back to their square one of ignorance. So instead of explaining everything to him about my excellent sense of foresight, I chose the easy path by flipping him the finger and giving him a few choice words that presented him the opportunity to return them back to me with interest and leave me to my room in peace. Ah, what a blessed friendship we share!

Oh, where are my manners? I probably need to give y'all a summary so that you can sympathize with my pain.

I'm Karthik Dubey, blah blah, CSE 3rd Year, etc etc, stuck in this godforsaken loop Groundhog Day-style except it's for an entire week, yada yada, between the days of March 25th-March 31st, since the past 52 loops. Now that we're done with the premise, shall we move on?

Now that both Arjun and my blissful sleep have abandoned me, I consider how to spend the rest of today. If I time it right, I could go to Mata for some chai sutta and reach in time for the surprise test. I personally couldn't care less about the test since my score will be erased by next week. However, the look of surprise and panic on the faces of my classmates never fails to be hilarious. There were also these 2 answers that I haven't been able to clear in all my attempts, so maybe today might be my lucky day.

Maybe I should skip the lab in the 2nd half and relax at Sheetal Das. I wonder what Sheetal Das is like on a Wednesday.

397th March 2020- Thursday: Week 53

Monotony is defined as tedious repetition and routine. Ever realized how there are sequences to your daily routine? A subconscious pattern that you follow the moment you're awake? Moving around on auto-pilot while getting things done — brushing, bathing, sipping that chai, and then some breakfast. There is that specific part of the day for your daily binge-fest, the same spot you always choose to relax in, the same tune you hum while you do some chores. After a while, when you try to think back upon a particular day, it feels like they have all melded together and are indistinguishable. That is monotony.

I have perpetual Déjà vu due to the loop that I am stuck in. It took me a while to realize that I had been stuck in this loop. Even now, I'd be unable to answer questions about anything particular I did from a few loop weeks back. It almost feels like I've been confined to a single place for months without any means of escape, albeit in a broader sense. I wonder how others would cope in such a situation.

406th March 2020- Friday: Week 54

Now some of you might be wondering, is this guy immortal? Like Tom Cruise from Edge of Tomorrow, who's stuck in this triggered-by-death loop to save Earth from some aliens. Just cool sci-fi stuff.

Honestly, I haven't given it much thought. I use this linear flow of the loop to keep track of the duration of my mental incarceration. I have no wish to keep reliving Wednesday morning and find out how far my hatred for Tunak Tunak can go. Moreover, no matter how bad this situation is, why take the risk of an untimely demise? Unlike Happy Death Day, I have no guarantee about the status of death in the loop, so it's not like I wish to find out that I'm wrong. How in the world will I explain this trauma to my therapist?

Kids, even if you feel like killing yourself for attending that same old boring lecture countless times (Friday 3rd class x54 for me), just don't. Have a cup of chai at Mata instead. Assured feel-good vibes.

415th March 2020- Saturday: Week 55

I really wish I could travel. While ideally, a week is enough to travel to certain places, especially if you don't need to worry about a return ticket, even such an escape isn't open to me. Turns out that the creator of my loop has also added travel restrictions to my list of woes. Traveling a certain distance away from college, be it reaching the airport or crossing the borders by train, causes me to blackout and awaken right at the start of the loop again. Do you think I willingly confined myself here all this while? RIP all them Kasol and Goa plans.

I swear, once I get out of this loop, I will not waste anymore of my days. I'll travel to all those bucket list locations. Nothing is going to stop me. Not even this minor flu that's apparently causing some scare in Wuhan. What's the worst thing some common cold is going to do?

424th March 2020- Sunday: Week 56

I sipped my drink and sighed as I watched Amar weep over yet another rejection by his crush. Well, for him, it's his first rejection, but this is a scene that I have witnessed so many times now that the shock value just isn't there anymore. I know, I know, you guys are probably thinking that "This guy literally has a cheat code to redo stuff and get his homie placed. How could he seem unconcerned about all this?"

Well, don't you think that I haven't already exhausted every loop-portunity to try and fix things? For context's sake, Amar and Sheetal are like Tim and Charlotte from the movie 'About Time.' No matter what the guy does, the lady is just not interested. Just make peace and move on buddy. I so wished I could knock some sense into his head.

However, I hold my tongue and silently observe as Arjun and Vinayak console our friend and ply with him ample amounts of "liquid" to drown his sorrows. I'd lost my cool a few loops back after another one of my "foolproof" plans failed all over again. I might have gone a tad bit overboard in my inebriated state in trying to invalidate his hopes and efforts. Even if I have grown jaded from repeated exposure, it was still his first heartbreak. Goes to show you that we humans are poor empathizers, as we may have forgotten that something we've adjusted to might be something raw and new to someone else.

Ah damn, looks like he's about to hurl. Definitely do not want a repeat of that time when I was within distance of the splatter zone.

433rd March 2020- Monday: Week 57

Humans are creatures of habits, patterns, and routines. And it is the mental exhaustion caused by these routines that produces monotony. We humans eventually come to hate monotony. When we experience new things and encounter the unknown, that is when we are alive. And it's when we realize that we've fallen into the depths of the pattern that we have our crisis.

I've had plenty of time to address my situation. I have been through a cycle of emotions -disbelief, perfectionism, rebellion, and now acceptance. I probably might not have my Groundhog Day-style redemption arc, trying to find that perfect sequence of events that'll free me from this loop. If this is what my new existence entails, then that's alright with me. I shall strive to create new experiences in the cycle that I've been confined to. And this cycle will lead to my new normal.

442nd March 2020- Tuesday: Week 58

Out of habit, I set the alarm to "Tadow" before I laid down to sleep. While I have come to terms with my new normal, some habits still die hard. Ah well, at least I had another fruitful week. I lived the days of this week as I felt I should have lived them. Not bad and not perfect. Just going with the flow and trying to experience something new.

As I slowly slid into the Land of Dreams, for the first time I felt a surge of restlessness and excitement. I was looking forward to the new week and the things I could do with my time. It's with that sense of acceptance that I fell asleep...

443rd March 2020- Wednesday: Week 59

1st April 2020- Wednesday: Week 0

...and woke up to the melody of "Tadow." Plot twist time!

My initial confusion and investigation were followed by bewilderment in this abrupt turn of events, followed by the fear of the unknown. So much for achieving Nirvana. I was finally free. And utterly overwhelmed by the possibilities that this freedom represented.

Later that day

I was walking back from the mess when I heard the news from Arjun. Something about college holidays because of some beer brand becoming viral. Didn't make a lot of sense to me. Little did I realize that this new word that I would be introduced to soon would wind up changing everything.

Lockdown